Don't Speak
by imdeadsothere
Summary: It's funny how empty one feels when they realize they've been chasing the wrong dream. SLASH. ONE-SHOT WITH ALTERNATE ENDING.
1. Happy Endings

AN: Normally I wait until the end for author's notes, but this one felt necessary. As you might notice, there are two chapters, though in actuality they are both the exact same story except with different endings. One's happy and one's sad, I won't tell you which is which because that will give it away but of course you could always just read the chapter titles and divine it for yourself, unless I was tricky and put the happy chapter title for the sad one and vice versa. You never know...

~.oOo.,.oOo.,.oOo.~

It started one night after the war when Harry had a nightmare and Ron found himself curling up in bed next to him in an attempt to calm him down. It worked. And they both woke up the next morning entangled in each other's arms not quite sure what to say. So they said nothing and instead pretended it never happened. But that night Ron found himself climbing into bed next to Harry anyway. It went on like this for some time, during the day they were exactly as they used to be but as night fell everything changed. In fact, it was during this night that they shared their first kiss. Harry was staring at the bright moon through his window, his lips forming the word "beautiful" but his vocal chords never caught up because Ron leaned over and kissed him, the soft moonlight bathing them both in what little light it could offer.

And this is how things were.

It was almost as if somewhere along the way they'd come to a silent agreement, the day was their time to live up to everybody else's expectations, but at night they cared only for their own hopes and dreams and each other, but this line was never crossed. They never cared what the world would think about them the instant night fell, and in daytime it was as if they were nothing more than two best mates, and for a while it seemed everything was perfect, and that they could just go on like this forever.

But they couldn't.

It was a beautiful autumn afternoon the day Ron broke Harry's heart. The two saw out in the yard, Ron was staring at his shoes and Harry was staring up at the beautiful autumn leaves, falling from the trees, like a brilliantly colored rain. Harry smiled and turned to look at Ron, his hair the color of the leaves, only softer. Because Ron's hair was definitely softer, and the color was nicer too.

"You're looking at me," Ron noted, not taking his eyes off of his shoes.

"I was admiring your hair," Harry replied. Ron didn't say anything.

"Are you okay?" Harry asked, "you seem kind of off."

"Yeah, fine."

"No you're not," Harry said poking him, "c'mon, tell me."

"Please don't pressure me Harry," Ron begged. Harry was taken aback; he leaned back in his chair, eyeing him.

"Okay, Ron, something's seriously up with you, what's going on?" Ron stared at his shoes some more.

"Ron please just…"

"I'm moving out."

"You're… what?"

"I'm moving out, my parents think I'm too old to still be living with you, they've found me my own place, I'm moving in next week."

"But… but what about… us?"

"There never was an us," Ron said, hardening his heart as it was the only way he could keep it from breaking.

"But… but even after everything," Harry whispered, not even realizing what he had said until the words had left his mouth. Ron looked up, and both boys stared into each other's eyes, and Ron could see that what Harry had said, it was the truth, and it nearly broke him to say the words that came next.

"I'm getting married Harry," Ron said, "my mother found a nice girl, I've met her a few times, she seems sweet enough, all she has to do is bear a few grandchildren."

"How long?" Harry whispered.

"How long what?"

"How long have you known?"

"Awhile."

"And you didn't tell me?"

"I didn't know how."

"You could have at least _tried_," Harry said, his voice rising up.

"Harry I'm sorry I just, it's not like there was ever anything much going on between us, just a few midnight trysts and nothing more." The words tasted like poison on his lips, but he knew they had to be said, he knew he was breaking Harry, but Harry was tough, he would survive and find a new person and move on without Ron. But not Ron, he had a family to please, and expectations to fulfill, he knew his parents were getting old, that they wouldn't be around long, the least he could do was let them see him settled down and married at last. Even since he was little, it was what he'd wanted, now he was finally going to get it, but yet it still hurt so much.

"I'm sorry Harry," Ron whispered.

"I loved you, you know," Harry whispered.

"I know but, I need to do this."

"We could have been happy together."

"No we couldn't have, what even where we Harry? Hidden in secret, only at night, what kind of a relationship was that?"

"It didn't have to be, I only kept it that way because I thought it was what you wanted!"

"Well I did, and now I want out."

"Ron please don't," Harry begged.

"I'm sorry Harry," Ron said, "I have to, I have to get married and have a family, it's the only way."

"The only way to what?"

"I don't know," Ron replied. Harry got up and headed back into the house, not giving him one final glance. And Ron left in the other direction.

The winter was cold that year. It seemed forever until spring finally rolled around and Ron found himself sitting in front of a dresser wearing a nice pair of dress robes, as outside a large tent was set up and all the guests began to arrive. It was his wedding day. He should be happy, shouldn't he? But yet he felt dead inside.

"Come on Ron!" Hermione called, rushing into the room, "it's almost time and you're still up here!" Ron said nothing. Hermione took one look at him and sighed.

"He's not here," she said sadly, both knowing of whom they spoke without a single name being mentioned.

"I know," Ron said, "I didn't expect it to."

"Look, Ron," Hermione said, sitting down next to him, "you don't have to do this."

"Yes I do, it's what they want."

"Well maybe you should do something for yourself," Hermione suggested, "you could be happy you know."

Ron just shook his head, "no, not me."

"Why not?"

"Because I don't deserve it," Ron replied simply, and stood up and headed for the tent. Hermione sighed, looking after him. She'd known what had been going on between Harry and Ron without them ever having to tell her, and she also knew that as much as they liked to pretend that it was nothing during that time when they'd been together she'd never seen them happy. She would swear on her life that never had there been two people more perfect for each other, but stupid Ron just couldn't see that. So instead she stood up and headed down joining the rest of the guests just as the wedding began.

Ron tried to smile as he walked down the aisle, he supposed later he could just pass off his emotionless state as a state of shock for the amazing thing he was about to do or some stupid shit like that. He still found his eyes scanning the crowd, hoping, no begging for Harry to be there. If he could at least see him there and know that Harry was there to support him no matter how much it hurt, maybe he could do this. But the chairs were completely Harry free, and just as empty as before he arrived at the altar. He didn't even look at the bride.

He zoned out about two minutes into the ceremony, instead watching a small black bird flitting around on the tree. He smiled lightly, for some reason the bird reminded him of Harry. It seemed determined to get at one particularly large nut that was way to big for it, but the small creature kept going at it, and to Ron's and the bird's surprise as well, even the toughest nut cracked.

"Mr. Weasley?" Ron's head swiveled around as the man presiding over the wedding called his name.

"Yes, huh?" Ron said.

"I said," the man repeated, "do you here take woman to be your lawfully wedded wife?" And it was just then that Ron caught the reflection of a skinny man with messy black hair hovering somewhere near the back, and in the words of the famous muggle Doctor Seuss his heart grew four sizes that day. And he smiled as he loudly said no, knowing that he had just avoided making the worst mistake of his life.

And then Ron turned and fled down the aisle and into the arms of the skinny man with the messy black hair at the back of the tent, and it was there that he kissed him, and wondered how he even _dared_ to think that he could survive without this man. When the two pulled apart a silence had fallen over the hall as most people gaped, except for Hermione who was beaming.

"You came back," Harry whispered quietly, staring up into Ron's eyes.

"I'm sorry I ever left," Ron replied, "and I'm sorry for every single day I thought I could go without you, and I'm sorry for every little thing I've ever done to hurt you and I know that it's almost too much to ask you to take me back and I know that if by some miracle you did that I would be completely undeserving but I just hope you can give me the chance to fix everything that ever went wrong and do never do wrong by you again, ever." Harry said nothing, as Ron just looked down at Harry, staring into his bright green eyes like the leaves of the tree that little bird was flitting through and he knew that Harry might be a tough nut to crack but somehow that bird managed it, and perhaps he might pull it off to.

"Harry?" Ron said quietly, as Harry still hadn't responded yet.

"You know you still haven't said you love me yet," Harry whispered.

"I know," Ron said, "and I do, but I know that if I said it now you would think it was just a ploy to try to get you back, because when I choose to say it I don't want it to be that, I want you to truly know that I mean it."

"You get one chance," Harry said, "so you'd better not screw it up."

"Thank you Harry," Ron breathed, pulling him into his arms, not kissing him because he knew there would be a time for that and now was not it. Now was the time for him to get to know Harry, really know him, be with him, cherish him, love him, do everything he knew he should have done ages ago.

The bride's family left in a huff soon after that, Mrs. Weasley was a bit shocked and went to bed early, but most of the others hung around, drinking champagne not quite sure what to say because this was definitely not something they expected. But Harry and Ron didn't mind, they just sat at an empty table, holding hands and for once just talking. Not as friends, but as lovers, seeing each other in a completely new light.

Hermione on the other hand spent most of the night bawling about how it was just so beautiful and gouging down on the wedding cake between the tears.

A month from that day Ron woke up one morning to find Harry sleeping softly next to him, he was surprised as Harry certainly hadn't been there the night before when he fell asleep, but he didn't mind. Instead he wrapped Harry tightly in his arms and when Harry woke up Ron whispered those three beautiful words, and Harry knew he meant them.


	2. Get Drunk and Cry

It started one night after the war when Harry had a nightmare and Ron found himself curling up in bed next to him in an attempt to calm him down. It worked. And they both woke up the next morning entangled in each other's arms not quite sure what to say. So they said nothing and instead pretended it never happened. But that night Ron found himself climbing into bed next to Harry anyway. It went on like this for some time, during the day they were exactly as they used to be but as night fell everything changed. In fact, it was during this night that they shared their first kiss. Harry was staring at the bright moon through his window, his lips forming the word "beautiful" but his vocal chords never caught up because Ron leaned over and kissed him, the soft moonlight bathing them both in what little light it could offer.

And this is how things were.

It was almost as if somewhere along the way they'd come to a silent agreement, the day was their time to live up to everybody else's expectations, but at night they cared only for their own hopes and dreams and each other, but this line was never crossed. They never cared what the world would think about them the instant night fell, and in daytime it was as if they were nothing more than two best mates, and for a while it seemed everything was perfect, and that they could just go on like this forever.

But they couldn't.

It was a beautiful autumn afternoon the day Ron broke Harry's heart. The two saw out in the yard, Ron was staring at his shoes and Harry was staring up at the beautiful autumn leaves, falling from the trees, like a brilliantly colored rain. Harry smiled and turned to look at Ron, his hair the color of the leaves, only softer. Because Ron's hair was definitely softer, and the color was nicer too.

"You're looking at me," Ron noted, not taking his eyes off of his shoes.

"I was admiring your hair," Harry replied. Ron didn't say anything.

"Are you okay?" Harry asked, "you seem kind of off."

"Yeah, fine."

"No you're not," Harry said poking him, "c'mon, tell me."

"Please don't pressure me Harry," Ron begged. Harry was taken aback; he leaned back in his chair, eyeing him.

"Okay, Ron, something's seriously up with you, what's going on?" Ron stared at his shoes some more.

"Ron please just…"

"I'm moving out."

"You're… what?"

"I'm moving out, my parents think I'm too old to still be living with you, they've found me my own place, I'm moving in next week."

"But… but what about… us?"

"There never was an us," Ron said, hardening his heart as it was the only way he could keep it from breaking.

"But… but even after everything," Harry whispered, not even realizing what he had said until the words had left his mouth. Ron looked up, and both boys stared into each other's eyes, and Ron could see that what Harry had said, it was the truth, and it nearly broke him to say the words that came next.

"I'm getting married Harry," Ron said, "my mother found a nice girl, I've met her a few times, she seems sweet enough, all she has to do is bear a few grandchildren."

"How long?" Harry whispered.

"How long what?"

"How long have you known?"

"Awhile."

"And you didn't tell me?"

"I didn't know how."

"You could have at least _tried_," Harry said, his voice rising up.

"Harry I'm sorry I just, it's not like there was ever anything much going on between us, just a few midnight trysts and nothing more." The words tasted like poison on his lips, but he knew they had to be said, he knew he was breaking Harry, but Harry was tough, he would survive and find a new person and move on without Ron. But not Ron, he had a family to please, and expectations to fulfill, he knew his parents were getting old, that they wouldn't be around long, the least he could do was let them see him settled down and married at last. Even since he was little, it was what he'd wanted, now he was finally going to get it, but yet it still hurt so much.

"I'm sorry Harry," Ron whispered.

"I loved you, you know," Harry whispered.

"I know but, I need to do this."

"We could have been happy together."

"No we couldn't have, what even where we Harry? Hidden in secret, only at night, what kind of a relationship was that?"

"It didn't have to be, I only kept it that way because I thought it was what you wanted!"

"Well I did, and now I want out."

"Ron please don't," Harry begged.

"I'm sorry Harry," Ron said, "I have to, I have to get married and have a family, it's the only way."

"The only way to what?"

"I don't know," Ron replied. Harry got up and headed back into the house, not giving him one final glance. And Ron left in the other direction.

The winter was cold that year. It seemed forever until spring finally rolled around and Ron found himself sitting in front of a dresser wearing a nice pair of dress robes, as outside a large tent was set up and all the guests began to arrive. It was his wedding day. He should be happy, shouldn't he? But yet he felt dead inside.

"Come on Ron!" Hermione called, rushing into the room, "it's almost time and you're still up here!" Ron said nothing. Hermione took one look at him and sighed.

"He's not here," she said sadly, both knowing of whom they spoke without a single name being mentioned.

"I know," Ron said, "I didn't expect him to be."

"Look, Ron," Hermione said, sitting down next to him, "you don't have to do this."

"Yes I do, it's what they want."

"Well maybe you should do something for yourself," Hermione suggested, "you could be happy you know."

Ron just shook his head, "no, not me."

"Why not?"

"Because I don't deserve it," Ron replied simply, and stood up and headed for the tent. Hermione sighed, looking after him. She'd known what had been going on between Harry and Ron without them ever having to tell her, and she also knew that as much as they liked to pretend that it was nothing during that time when they'd been together she'd never seen them happy. She would swear on her life that never had there been two people more perfect for each other, but stupid Ron just couldn't see that. So instead she stood up and headed down joining the rest of the guests just as the wedding began.

Ron tried to smile as he walked down the aisle, he supposed later he could just pass off his emotionless state as a state of shock for the amazing thing he was about to do or some stupid shit like that. He still found his eyes scanning the crowd, hoping, no begging for Harry to be there. If he could at least see him there and know that Harry was there to support him no matter how much it hurt, maybe he could do this. But the chairs were completely Harry free, and just as empty as before he arrived at the altar. He didn't even look at the bride.

He zoned out about two minutes into the ceremony, instead watching a small black bird flitting around on the tree wondering what the hell he was doing. Maybe Hermione was right. Maybe this wasn't about everyone else anymore, maybe for once in his life he should get to be the one to be happy. He checked the reflections of the large mirrors that had been places as part of the decorations, scanning the crowd, begging Harry to be there, maybe if he was, just maybe, he might turn around, he might not go through with this, he might…

"Mr. Weasley?" Ron's head swiveled around as the man presiding over the wedding called his name.

"Yes, huh?" Ron said.

"I said," the man repeated, "do you here take woman to be your lawfully wedded wife?"

Ron was silent for the longest moment, he checked the mirrors again still no sign of Harry. Slowly, with a sigh of resignation, he whispered the words "I do" and kissed the bride. And in the very back row a raven haired man stood up and left.


End file.
